Only the Good Die Young
It’s been a while since I’ve posted here in the Long Island Blog. I like to keep the blog fresh with good material that I think other people would enjoy reading and that’s usually pretty easy when you write about Long Island.
However…
In October one of my children’s friends was killed—murdered senselessly in a drive-by shooting—and that knocked the wind out of my sails.
She wasn’t the target. With bullets flying everywhere, everyone was the target. Several people were hit; she’s the only one that died.
I barely knew Danielle, but she was my son’s best friend and very close with my daughter. There’s still a message from Danielle on our answering machine. My kids were devastated. I can only imagine how her family must feel.
As for me, I don’t know. Something like this makes one question everything, and there’s not a religion or philosophical tenet that can answer the big question that everyone asks: why?
How can someone born with every gift, who meant so much to so many, perish under such senseless circumstances? There’s no resolution here. Time will numb the pain and reveal the silver lining, if there is one, but the damage is done and there will always be scars.
So how does one cope? I tell my kids to remember and honor Danielle by living the kind of life she would have wanted for them. Don’t be depressed, just get up and go the same way she used to.
Because if you don’t, then you become another victim of this utterly senseless crime.
so sorry to hear this sad, sad news 🙁
Comment by Bettye — December 6, 2008 @ 2:20 pm
Bettye & Barbara, Thank you for the kind words. It’s not like I’ve been wallowing in depression all this time. It just derailed me for a while and I’ve fallen out of the groove. I felt I should post some kind of explanation for the long silence.
The first couple of weeks were pretty tough on my kids (my son got a memorial tattoo on his arm) and I was consumed with worry about them. We went to the wake and that was pretty bad. Half of East Islip must have been there and the family was pretty broken up. It really made us sick.
And you start to wonder about things that don’t generally come to mind like God, destiny, free will… It can be quite a downer.
If you get Newsday this story was on the front page of Sunday’s paper back in October. You might have seen it.
At any rate, things like this happen and all we can do is move on. It’s sad but that’s the way it is.
Comment by Bill — December 7, 2008 @ 8:47 am
True words dad. I think about her everyday, thanks for honoring her here.
Comment by mandy — February 3, 2009 @ 10:55 am
Peace, daughter. Peace.
Comment by Bill — February 4, 2009 @ 6:06 am
I lost my cousin, Allison Aubrecht, this last March. She lived in Houston, TX. We were very close and I love and miss her every day. She was shot in the back of her head by a person who stated that he did not know the gun was loaded. The media and the police were calling it an accident. I am still trying to move on. I believe there is a plan for all of us and we should live each day to the fullest. I would give almost anything for one more day with Allison who was only 17 years old and just starting out in life. The person who killed her will most likely get off which I do not understand. How can someone shoot and kill another person and say “Oops didn’t know the gun was loaded” and it is called an accident. I think that is the hardest part for me. I understand what you are feeling. Time will pass and we all move on with our lives but things like this are hard to wrap our minds around as like most caring people we would never think to do such a thing and take a life and that makes it even harder to understand how it is so easy for others.
Comment by Betsy — February 26, 2010 @ 4:53 pm
I understand your frustration, Betsy. We had a similar incident here on Long Island recently. Some idiot pointed a gun at someone and pulled the trigger thinking it was a funny thing to do. He didn’t realize that the gun was loaded. What a dope.
Comment by Bill — March 1, 2010 @ 6:46 am